You've got to have a dream

Oh gosh been a long time hasn't it. Guess that all work and no play has made Jack (or Jill) very dull indeed.

A lot could be said for dreams.

"If you don't have a dream, how you gonna have a dream come true?"
"I have a dream today"
"Don't push too hard your dreams are china in your hand"

How true the last one became of late. A dream of mine shattered by my own hand.

I won't go into details, but the moment it happened the world seemed desolate and futureless. Then, shortly afterwards, as now, I realised that the dream would have meant a lot of sacrifice and maybe seeing a lot less of that which is very important to me; home and hubby.

The dream could come true yet, but it would take a while to materialise and I've probably alienated the person fighting my corner. I think they will talk to me again, maybe they will see it as just bad luck...or maybe they will think I'm a total fool to throw it away as simply as I did.

I have to talk abstractly. Maybe next year, when enough time has passed, with time to heal, and memories have a chance to fade a little, I will state more in depth about what happened.

Meantime, I have to find another dream....ah but I do have plenty on the shelf. :)

Excellent site

I wouldn't say that I'm miserable in my job, lets just say that I feel that I'm starting to stagnate and want to move on. I wondered whether I could do anything other than payroll, which I have been doing for nearly 20 years.

I did the fun test. Here is something a lot, lot better.

Its a shame that you have to pay to see your top 10 ideal careers, and it is a yankie site as well (so the top 10 may have different names/values here in the UK), but it is incredibly accurate. When I read the basic assessment after doing the test (persevere, it takes around 15 minutes but it is worth it) I thought, wow, that is me to a tee.

Still, the guy who designed the software is the one who is no doubt selling it, so his career is well mapped out. I was (almost) tempted to buy it. But what it has done, at least, is to see me for what I really am at work.

Apostrophe Apostacy

Those that read and have read my writing know that my grammar ain't so good.

I don't realise until its pointed out to me, and even then I don't always understand.

An old English teacher had fits of giggles with one piece I did. "You kept going in and out of the past tense" she said, "It was incredibly confusing and amusing - all at the same time"

And I frequently use 'of' when I should use 'have'. Such times I just throw my hands up in surrender and think - well as long as I use good grammar on official stuff, or that there is someone on hand to make sure that I don't contradict myself, if I am understandable, there should be no problem.

But there is just one thing...

just one thing...

oops sorry, got caught up Eurythmics-style there. There is just one bit of bad grammar that really really really really REALLY bugs me, big time. That is using apostrophes in the wrong place and at the wrong time. (That, and confusing their, there and they're)

Glory hallelujah. There is someone that also cringes when they see signs such as "Hot Cross Bun's". She's right here.

Why does it make me cringe? Because I learnt how to use the apostrophe at 7. Since 7 year olds cannot work legally, those over 16 have no excuse.

There is one who considers that we should rid ourselves of the apostrophe altogether. Like here. Hang on though - isn't this just laziness? I mean, if I removed all the apostrophes out of this one post alone, I reckon it would be near unintelligible. Text messages and e-mails apparently, make the apostrophe obsolete, as common usage is kicking the poor punctuation mark into touch. OK, whilst we're at it, lets get rid of the full stop, comma and semi-colon and get breathless when we read the stuff that are written by 17 year olds who are meant to be fully literate.

Anyway, my English teachers, bosses and myself would have nothing to moan about.

Resolution by Proxy

Haven't quite got round to resolution 1 yet, but the SOH said to me the other day he was going to give up. I have not seem him put a cigarette to his lips today. He hasn't said a word to me about it, but I know it is his way of telling me, wordlessly, that he is serious.

This is good news. It should encourage me.

I don't usually do this kind of thing

I don't make New Year's resolutions. Well not normally anyway. I make so many promises during the year which I break, what is the point of using a new year as an excuse? However, two things have made me change my mind this year. One, I'm in a new location, and, excuse the slightly soppy moment, is the place that I have been waiting my whole life to live in, before I even knew it existed. It sorta makes me feel I need to pay back something, in some way. Two, as this is an online, permanent diary which I can't lose, burn, deface or otherwise destroy (without hitting the dreaded delete button) I can come back on 31 December 2006 to see how I did.

1. Give up smoking. The old favourite. However, I think within a few years its gonna be illegal to inflict such harm on yourself, let alone other people. May as well pre-empt that.

2. Learn Welsh. Already started that one. Don't ask me why, but a good reason seems to be that a lot of jobs seem to depend on you being bi-lingual. Why, when probably 90%+ of the time they speak English is likely something they don't even know. But I don't want to be accused of being party to a murder. Even if it is of a language. And I may do that simply by learning it. We'll see.

3. Not to blow my top when the SOH buys yet another radio. He has to have something to keep him occupied.

4. Get another job. Since an ex-employee got severely reprimanded for slagging off his employer on a blog, I'm not going to comment further, let alone give you the name of the company. I think the resolution says it all.

5. Try and find another hobby other than spending too much time playing "The Waitress" and "Theme Hospital" There's more to life to Omelettes and Bloaty Head.

6. Learn to write short stories. A previous boss says I have a talent for writing. Well, let's develop it. If the rest of the world agrees, resolution 4 is sorted. If not, at least I can say I tried.

7. Get my driving license updated. One thing I haven't done. Since I have to change from paper to card license, this means braving the photo booth. After having a good laugh at the SOH's photos today, I think I owe him that, even though I don't drive any more.

That'll do. If I think of any more they'll be here tomorrow.